I arrived in Australia (from South Africa), to start my life again in 2008. Knowing No-one on the Gold Coast, having no employment and having twins aged 4 and another daughter aged 1, I was in need of growing my business as quickly as possible.

But HOW? With small children running around, having no startup capital, no marketing budget, plus the industry I was in (personal trainer) was saturated, HOW was I go to establish my personal branding, stand out and get clients?

It’s never all about the money! Money problems and challenges are always signs of underlying limiting ideas about our worth and regard for ourselves.

I realise that’s a bold starting statement. However, the more I work with individuals, particularly women, the more I realise this is true. The stories we tell ourselves can take various forms, shapes, and sizes, but they are always present just under the surface.

The most significant obstacles people encounter when it comes to money management are connected to their own identity, fear of not being in charge and losing face with their peers. The strange aspect is that many folks are in the same position as you. If I had a $1 for every time I talked about this in my 20 years (plus!) in the finance industry…well, let’s say I’d be very comfortable.

Women prefer to avoid discussing money and lose control and ownership of their circumstances. “I’ve never been good with numbers,” for example, is a common phrase I hear. What was the source of that? Who said that to you?

It’s time to take control of your money, not your story, and the following focus areas will help you get started!

PERSONAL INSIGHTS

Knowing your numbers is the most crucial element of managing your own money. If you don’t know where you are, then the finest map in the world won’t help you!

You must first understand what makes up your money pot in order to have a choice in your life about where and what you spend it on. Everything that comes in and goes out is included in the ‘pot.’ Having a clear image of where your money is going may help you achieve clarity, awareness, and efficiency.

That all sounds very straightforward, right?

Many of the women and couples I deal with are unsure where to begin and are utterly overwhelmed, especially when there is a significant level of humiliation (and even shame) involved. It’s no surprise that many of us are content to stay in our comfort zones (or so we believe!) and expect that our present financial position will suddenly improve. By the way, hoping (or playing the lottery!) is not a strategy — I’ve tried it numerous times and it still doesn’t work!
Nobody taught us this things when we were kids, yet it seems like society expects us to know everything now! Even more so if you are skilled in your field. Furthermore, in many groups, talking about money is still considered a taboo issue, with others telling you, “It is not polite to talk money.”
What do we mean when we say “power,” “success,” and “status”? MONEY, you guessed it!

TIP #1 – GET TO KNOW YOUR MONEY POT, TRACK YOUR LIFESTYLE SPENDING ON A DAILY BASIS FOR AT LEAST 30 DAYS.

BUSINESS INSIGHTS

There’s nothing like establishing your own business to put a focus on your sense of self-worth — you can’t hide behind a title or a paycheck, especially if you work in the service sector, where you are your product! And, because your relationship with money may be a reflection of how you value yourself, it can have a significant negative influence on your business’s performance — take it from someone who knows!
Take into account the following:
When you were a kid, how was money discussed (if at all)?
When you think about money, how do you feel?
How would you describe your present financial relationship?
These are all part of your Money Story, and it’s critical to comprehend the influence your money connection has on your motives and behaviour – every…single…day.
It is critical that you comprehend how your financial narrative manifests itself in your business and how it may be holding you back. For example, getting caught up in the desire to have all the bright and shiny things in order for your business to succeed – although it is necessary to have certain foundations in place to begin started, the silver bullet you seek is found within you!

TIP #2 – MAKE SURE YOU SET UP A BUSINESS BANK ACCOUNT AND KEEP YOUR PERSONAL AND BUSINESS EXPENSES COMPLETELY SEPARATE

RELATIONSHIP INSIGHTS

Imagine telling two people with entirely different Money Stories that they had to pool all of their funds, make financial decisions together, agree on them, and be fully committed and on board with everything? Isn’t that insane? But that’s exactly what we tell couples to do when they start a new relationship and things grow serious.

Now, I’m not saying that this isn’t essential, or that couples shouldn’t be involved in the process, but this is the primary reason why most couples claim that “money is the only thing we argue over!”

Couples must be aware of each other’s Money Stories and the implications for every money talk they have, as well as every view and filter that is both expressed and unsaid. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve watched something uttered out of love and support that was misinterpreted as an attack and everything but support, with neither person realising what had happened. They just felt like there was a chasm and that they weren’t being heard.

Couples should make time to talk about money and family finances on a regular basis, keep lines of communication open, and check in with each other about what’s going on in their lives.

TIP #3 – IN RELATIONSHIPS, EACH PERSON GETS A POCKET MONEY ACCOUNT THAT HAS A ‘NO QUESTIONS ASKED’ POLICY